(Source: tsundere-dragon)

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Date night


Date night

(Source: ghostlytreats)

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Painfully average looking with a great sense of humor and always down to get drunk

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just had a dream where someone stole my socks and framed me for murder using the dna on them

i dreamt i stole someones socks omg

i’m calling the police

posted 1 day ago with 55,499 notes   via: walmart-dot-com   source: bombing    reblog


I think I’m going to write a book called “‘Four Hours Is Definitely Enough Sleep’ And Other Lies I Tell Myself”

posted 1 day ago with 224,778 notes   via: fake-mermaid   source: suzysils    reblog
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(Source: nidokingu)

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ah yes add me on skype so i can be too afraid to talk to you ever

(Source: psyaichi)

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(Source: hqlines)

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“I CANT BREATHE” i typed as i breathed 

posted 5 days ago with 339,979 notes   via: fake-mermaid   source: laughingnancy    reblog


last year i was eating in a fancy, large restaurant when i began to hear a rumble and the distant sound of people chanting ‘potassium, potassium’ and suddenly hundreds of people dressed as bananas flood this restaurant chanting potassium over and over and we were trapped there for a very long time because the bananas would not leave and they were everywhere

imagei wasn’t joking

posted 5 days ago with 347,254 notes   via: walmart-dot-com   source: keepongaming    reblog